Falstaff and four leaf clovers

It's amazing how early relationships affect the rest of our lives.  When we're young it seems like time is forever and things seem to move much more slowly.  Two years feel like ten until you're almost forty, then one year feels like only a few months have gone by before you're busy making new year's resolutions you have every intention of keeping.  Back to relationships.  There are a few pieces in my book that deal with some of these life affecting relationships.  One poem called Falstaff is about some of the memories and emotions I have concerning my father's mother.  She chose to be called 'Mammy,' which didn't go over well with my own mother.  She didn't quite like it, but my Mammy said, "That's just the way it is," and it was.  Looking back, now that I'm older, I realize that 'Mammy' is not exclusively used by colored women, though it is stereotyped in such a manner.  My grandmother married a Conway, and try as I may, I can't trace back my father's family name which is a source of endless frustration for me, because it is also my name.  My Mammy's husband was quite old, he was born in 1887 or something close to that.  He passed away when my father was about five years old.  Mammy is a term of endearment for Irish mothers, and even though my Mammy was of French descent, I believe she may have taken this name in honor of my grandfather's heritage.  Much of my writing used to be spontaneous, on the spot, in the moment writing.  I find that it has evolved into recording memories, history and reliving those things which are not only beyond the present moment, but unattainable.  This is where the poem Falstaff originated for me.  Looking back on those days when I still believed in Santa Claus and Fairy Tales, when the days were spread thick with innocence and not yet tainted with the cynicism of adulthood.  When we were surrounded by family and could plunder into the clover patches next to Mammy's house on Palmyra Street in New Orleans and find not just one four leaf clover, but two or three; sometimes the rare five leaf clover!  Days of magic and believing, I have those moments still, but looking back on times when the imagination stretched towards the horizon past the vanishing point; it feels good to remember. 

I still look for the Falstaff weather ball when I am in New Orleans; there is a rumor that it will be repaired and work just as it used to when I was a kid.  I'm still waiting for that day eagerly.  The old brewery has been converted into condominiums now, which is fine with me because at least it will keep the old building from being torn down and it finally has life again!  I think all old buildings await to be rediscovered and reinterpreted into something useful.  I am not a fan of the wrecking ball.  You can read the poem Falstaff in my book, I Wandered from New Orleans, along with other New Orleans flavored poems. http://www.tracyconway.com/